Wait

Wait is a 4 letter word. We hit a major roadblock Sunday night in our lives, and I am not handling it as well as I "should" be. If you know me, you know that we are having a new house built within a 1/4 mile of Central's South Campus. We drive past it daily, and I have thought about it constantly since we signed papers last December (actually, even before that when I saw neighborhood infrastructure going in). I knew with absolute certainty that this was where we were supposed to be. I have envisioned small group and leadership meetings being held in our home. I have all my decorating planned out for the new house. We already had our path planned out to ride our bikes to church...

Well, that brings us to Sunday night. We had our friend and realtor come over so we could finally list our house. I admit that I was not looking forward to having our house for sale with two little girls, but it was a necessary evil. We knew the real estate market had slowed down, but we were not prepared by how much it had come to a screeching halt, and even gone backwards. Now we are faced with the realization that our current house is not worth enough to make it possible for us to move into the new house (I know it is just a house,but I have to admit that the tears are falling again even as I type). In December we were overjoyed beyond belief when we lock in the price of the new house and thought that our current house would continue to gain equity through the year allowing us to have cash to landscape and paint once we moved (I had even had hopes of getting a mini van once we were settled). And, to top it all off, all of our savings is tied up as earnest money with the builder and we will more than likely lose it all if we walk away from the new house. Being a one income, stay at home mom family is hard enough to make ends meet when you know in the back of your mind that you have a buffer saved up for a rainy day in a savings account, but now even that may be gone.

Now we wait. We haven't totally given up on the new house. We are going to look at the real estate market again in a month or two and see what has happened. With such a drastic turn in the market, we will see what our builder is doing to keep buyers (there must be many families who are in a similar situation and our builder won't want to be left with unsold homes). But waiting and not knowing is hard. For me it is so much more than a real estate deal or financial investment, we are dealing with our home, and it's hitting me hard.

I know God is in control and I should "cast all my cares upon Him," and I'm really trying. No one is sick or hurt. In reality it could be so many worse things, but I am still affected. So, if you have actually read all the way to the end of my rambling, please pray for me. Pray that God will give me and Tony "a peace that passes all understanding". Pray that He will grant us wisdom and patience over the next weeks and months. Pray that He will teach us that He provides our daily bread and not to place our hope on things of this world (oh no, here come the tears again). Pray that we will know in our hearts as well as in our heads that He is in control. And while you're at it, send me an e-mail or post a comment so I know that our friends are lifting us up.

Love,
Sara