Letter to Me

Today is my birthday, 32nd (in case you were wondering). This morning I heard a song on the radio and can't stop thinking about it. It was called "Letter to Me" and it is about a man writing a letter to his teenage self about all the life happenings and lessons to come. Thirty-two is double 16, and since Sweet Sixteen still sticks out in my mind as such a memorable milestone, I've been thinking about what I would tell my sixteen year old self about what to expect in the coming sixteen years.

Dear Sara,

Enjoy high school. Right now you are on the edge of your life. Be thankful for the friends that you have and cherish them. Some of them will stick around for many years to come. Relax a little more about school. Yes, school is very important, but it isn't the end all of everything, and your identity is not wrapped up in how well you do and who you please. The Mexico trips will change your life. The world is bigger than Mesa, and some people have less than we do, but yet are happier and more content than we are.

College (NAU) will not be what you expected, and you will experience heartache, but it will not last forever (though at times it will feel like it will). I don't know why you will struggle, but know that you did your best and it will change you forever. But pay more attention to the guy that hangs around your dorm (more about him later).

When you do move back home, your Central friends will welcome you back with open arms. Let them love you, and love them back. It is ok to have "good clean fun" in college--playing board games, road trips, watching movies. Enjoy that time.

Make sure you go on the missions trip to Poland. It will show you how great God is, and that He is the creator of all people of every nation (more about this later).

Pay attention to the boy that always offers to drive when you go out with a group of friends. And notice that he always drops you off last, even when it's out of the way. But don't rush anything. Enjoy your time as "just friends" because that will lay a priceless foundation for your future.

But eventually that "just friends" relationship is going to evolve into "best friends" and then "exclusive friends who spend all their time together" and finally you will start dating. Be thankful that he is so sweet and caring and available. Those are the traits that you will cherish for years to come.

I am so glad that you decided on a degree in education. You are going to love those kids that you teach and love teaching. Your career will be short, but it will do it's job in preparing you for a much more important career.

At the same time you will be finishing college and planning a wedding. Don't let it stress you out. You will have a long engagement. In the end it will be good to have a year of teaching (with income) under your belt so that Tony can finish school and you can buy your first house. A year and a half engagement will feel like forever, but it isn't forever, and hold true to your purity. It will be worth it! I promise. It also speaks volumes about the integrity of the man you marry.

Your teaching career will be short, but those kids will have a special place in your heart, and you will always remember them and think about them often.

Your life will change in early May when your teaching career suddenly ends and you are put on bed rest to best care for you and your firstborn. Later that month, you will celebrate your 25th birthday at Olive Garden, but your feet will be propped up to keep your blood pressure down. And two days later you will be holding a miracle.

Her first year will fly by, though many of the days themselves are long, and before you know it, you will be pregnant again with another baby girl. Some days you will think you are going crazy with two babies at home, but it will all be worth it. They will grow to be best friends and you can never replace the years that you stayed home with them.

Before you know it, Megan will be starting school. It will be an adjustment to be the parent, rather than the teacher, but you will have a special love and sympathy for her teachers because you've been there and you know the work that it entails.  Soon you will start to realize that Emily is also about to head off to school, and your heart will ache that you will be home alone during the days. You will feel like your family is not complete, though a few years ago you were sure that you were going to be a family of four. That ache will continue until you can't escape it. And then you will start the process to bring Allison into your family.

Remember when you went to Poland and learned that the world wasn't as big as you thought? Well, another instance of that changing your life is that your third daughter is coming to you from the other side of the world.

So at 32, life is good and you are very blessed. So enjoy these years.

Love,
Me